Strangeness of Jeff Hardy
by kbbaby2123
Summary: Yeah, this is my first wrestling fic, and I've been wanting to write one of these.. ANYWAY! Clearly, it's about Jeff Hardy, and he's wondering why everyone is acting so strange around here! Will he get to the bottom of it? Please R&R! Oh,and I OWN NO ONE!


Quick note to everyone: I OWN NO ONE!!! If I did, they might be on eBay for millions of dollars. Except for 'Taker, the Hardys, and Triple H. Seriously, I own no one, or anything in this fic!!!

_What the hell is going on here?_ I asked myself as I walked into the arena this morning.

Dave (Finlay) and Dylan are hanging upside down from the ropes and Matt is lifting Mark (Henry) like he's nothing! Mark ('Taker) and Glen are getting crazy, as in they got to the hardest level of Guitar Hero.

"Glen! I can't feel my arms any more!!!"

"I warned you not to do the windmill!!!"

"Go to hell Glen!"

"I own it!"

(awkward silence…)

"JEFFREY!!!"

"Huh?"

"Pay attention will ya? I won't repeat myself about this!!!"

"What the-? Punk?"

"Yes! Now pay attention or you'll never learn to fly!"

"Maybe later…"

"NO! NOT LATER, NOW!!!"

"Jeff, are you okay?"

"No Matt, I am not okay! You're all scaring the crap out of me!!!"

(John Cena runs up into my face)

"You can't see me, as I am a ninja and I'm moving to Japan!!!"

"What the hell, John? Why are you going to Japan???"

" 'Cause I'm gonna be a ninja!!!"

"Someone please tell me I'm dreaming."

(SMACK!!!)

(one hospital visit later)

"Where the hell am I?"

"Dude, you gotta watch your back-"

"And the rest of you!"

"-when Dave's around. Especially 'cause Jericho is 1 contender."

"He runs around with weapons all the time and hits people for the most random of things!"

"Punk, why are you here? I mean, I understand Matt being here, but you…"

"Because I'm the one who had to carry your fat ass here!!!"

"Why didn't they bring an ambulance? Or have Glen or Mark carry me?"

"A building conveniently exploded at the same time and Mark and Glen are too absorbed in Guitar Hero!"

"Right…"

(one week later on Smackdown!)

"Hey Matt, ready for our tag match tonight?"

"Huh? Oh yeah. Sure thing."

"What's up with everyone lately??? Why is everyone acting all weird around me like I'm a freak?????"

"Easy there, Jeff. You'll see what's up after the show. Just concentrate on the match against Miz and Morrison."

(one ass kicking of Miz and Morrison later…)

"Well, what the hell is going on?"

"Follow me."

(one long ass bus ride across town later…)

"Go on in." Matt gestured to an old worn down door that looked like it was going to fall apart if I touched it. I opened the door, but when I looked back, Matt wasn't there. I got chills but proceeded in. The building was completely dark, and I probably couldn't have seen my hand if I put it in front of my face. I heard a creak and called out.

"Hello??? Matt??? Who's there???" Dead silence. I took a few steps forward and the door slammed behind me. *gulp*

"Are you the one they call Jeff Hardy?"

"Y-y-yes…?"

"Follow me." A candle suddenly flickered to life in front of me and I followed it. The light was dim, so I couldn't see much. As we walked, I tried to make small talk.

"Do you live here?"

"No I do not. But I know this place like the back of my hand. We're almost there. Keep silent, or you'll never see daylight again." We walked down what seemed like a million corridors, and entered a room. The person handed me the candle and said, "Good luck, Jeff Hardy." I walked in and a bunch of small candles were lit a few feet in front of me. The lights turned on and a cloaked figure sat in front of me.

"Are you here for the party?"

"What?"

"The party. You _are_ Jeff Hardy, yes?"

"Yeah…"

"Everyone, he's here." All of the people I had seen before, the Marks, Glen, Matt, Punk, Miz, Morrison, the two Daves, Dylan, Cena, and even Jericho were there, but they looked like zombies. They all spoke at the same time too.

"We've been waiting for you Jeff. Come and celebrate with us."

"What are you 'celebrating'?"

"Only one of the greatest champions in WWE history. Shh! He has just arrived. Hide quickly Jeff, or the surprise will be ruined." Before I could react, zombie Matt had pulled me behind the closet door with him and the lights went out again.

"Hello?" The one in the chair spoke in a whisper and said, "One, two, three…"

"SURPRISE!!! CONGRATS ON THE 13th WORLD TITLE PAUL!!!"

"Paul? Oh you mean Hun-" They all hissed at me and screamed, "DON'T YOU DARE CALL HIM THAT!!!" Needless to say I shut up pretty damn quick.

"Hey Jeff. Come here." I walked right up to him and quickly asked what he wanted.

"You make me laugh Jeffrey. Alas, I don't want anything from you. Look up." A brass ring.

"What kind of bull are you trying to pull?"

"I didn't do it. I just want to see something. Try to grab it." I tried and tried. I was always one second away*hangs head*. Hun- I mean Paul grabbed it on his first try. I started to get angry. Vladimir Kozlov entered the room, "demanding better challenge". He started to fight Paul for the ring, and I tried too. But it suddenly seemed that I was falling away, through the floor, and Adam came in, stealing the ring. I just kept falling, and falling, and falling.~

I sat up, grabbed my notebook and pen, and quickly jotted down: 'Never, EVER, EVER!!! Drink hot chocolate and eat Reese's peanut butter cups with pepperoni before bed again!!! EVER!!!' I set the notebook and pen back down, and fell back to sleep.


End file.
